


Consent...?

by Jofiel



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Aftercare, Age Difference, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, BDSM, Butt Plugs, Dom Castiel, Hurt Dean Winchester, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Miscommunication, Rape/Non-con Elements, Safewords, Self-Doubt, Self-Esteem Issues, Sub Dean Winchester, Subdrop
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-13
Updated: 2018-03-13
Packaged: 2019-03-30 17:14:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,815
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13956276
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jofiel/pseuds/Jofiel
Summary: Dean and Castiel are in a dom/sub relationship, but Dean was never taught to value himself in such a way a sub would. When he lets himself slip too far without asking his dom for help and lets Castiel unintentionally hurt him, will it break their relationship?





	Consent...?

**Author's Note:**

> Well, prepare for the angst. If any of the tags make you uncomfortable or if it will do you harm to read about someone pretty much unintentionally raping the love of their life, then do yourself a favor and leave. I'm sure I'll have plenty of gentler fics up soon for you. If you're a whore for angst, this one is for you!

Cas and Dean had always had rather alternative preferences when it came to relationships. That is, Dean liked to be tied up, choked, fucked, spat on, and even cut sometimes. In fact, he fucking loved it. And Cas, well he had always had a preference, no, a need to be the one in control of everything, to be taking advantage of a sub- of course, with their full consent and nothing less. And also aftercare, and love and cuddling and reassurances after a scene. That was why when he had found Dean, the most beautiful submissive he'd ever scened with, he was immediately hooked. Plus, with Dean being only twenty, a full twelve years younger than the experienced Dom, it hit Cas' age kink hard. Deans, too. 

The only issue was that Dean hadn't been taught any safety precautions or aftercare methods before Cas came along, so sometimes he'd have a subdrop and he'd forget that he deserved aftercare, love, even that he deserved to be treated relatively humanely. In fact, he could close up so fast after a scene sometimes Cas swore he'd get emotional whiplash. However, the worst was when Dean would be fine right after a late-night scene, even the morning after, all the way up until Cas left to go be super-lawyer and bring home the big bucks. Then Dean would drop, alone, without any idea what was happening or how to help himself. That had almost ended things between Dean and Castiel a couple of times.

This was one of those times. The scene the previous night had been mind-blowing, and afterward, Cas had treated Dean to a bath with one of those expensive bath-bombs that exploded sparkles and soothing herbs along with a litany of praises. You did so well, Dean. Perfect. You were so beautiful, you're so good. Did so well. You're gorgeous when you come like that. I love you, Dean. I love you. Dean could still hear them now, all of the praises, all of the comforts and he could still feel Cas' large, strong hands kneading into his muscles, pulling him out of subspace and into a drowsy after-sex haze. God, he'd felt so happy. And this morning had been fine, too, all the way up until Dean emerged from the bedroom and comfortable darkness of sleep, finding that Cas had already left for work.

He'd felt fine until he started pouring his black coffee that Cas always teased him for liking. You're so soft and sweet, Dean. How is it that my little kitten likes something so bitter as that? Even I can't stand it. Dean had smiled upon remembering that. He kept replaying the words Cas had said to him last night, though, and eventually, Dean's self-destructive brain had twisted Castiel's words into something far less sweet than he'd previously thought and dwelled on happily. You're gorgeous when you come. You did so well, Dean. You scened perfectly. God, was that all Cas loved him for?

Dean frowned. Suddenly, he didn't want his coffee anymore. Why would Cas' little kitten, his plaything, boytoy, object for his pleasure want anything when words like that kept running through his head? Slut, whore, comerag, thirsty for cock, good-for-nothing warm hole, princess, kitten, baby boy, cock-sucker. Dean couldn't stop replaying every dirty, yet now insulting, name Cas had referred to him as. His brain made sure to skip things like baby, sweetheart, love of my life to make Dean feel extra awful. Slave, sex toy, fleshlight, fucktoy. Dean didn't really want breakfast, either. He headed back to bed. 

All throughout the day, Dean laid in bed. He didn't, couldn't sleep, not with his Cas, his beloved Castiel screaming degrading names inside his head at him. He didn't cry, didn't eat, didn't fucking call Cas to ask for help. He did absolutely nothing until-

Dean's phone buzzed. He looked down: a text from Cas. Dean opened the message reluctantly.

Cas: Be ready for me when I get home. I want you wearing just a glass plug, ready for me, waiting, kneeling on the bedroom floor. Don't touch yourself or you won't come for a week. Safewords are the same as always. 

Dean swallowed bile rising up his throat. He didn't want that, he didn't want any of it, not at all. Dean wanted a romantic dinner, to make love, not fuck, he wanted Cas not to be his dominant again tonight, but instead just his boyfriend. The love of his life. Was that reciprocated, though? Dean sent a quick Yes, master to Cas, hurriedly pushing all thoughts of doubt away. If sex was the only thing keeping Cas with Dean, Dean certainly wasn't going to push Cas away. he would take what he could get. And with that, he stood, going to grab the lube and a medium-sized pink glass plug.

Dean could've cried during prepping. He was terrified, scared out of his mind all throughout it. He considered going to the ER. He couldn't get hard, no matter what he did. He rubbed insistently at his prostate, stretched and twisted his fingers inside himself, rubbed at his usually-sensitive nipples until they were sore, tried every trick he knew about trying to get himself to come. He even played with his limp cock, despite Cas' orders, trying to prove to himself that he wanted this and he was fine. He was fine if it meant Cas was happy. So, despite his body's clear rejection of the idea of sex, Dean slipped in the plug deftly, made the bed, dimmed the lights and kneeled.

By the time Cas got home Dean knew his knees were going to bruise. He didn't care. It was what Cas wanted.

"Dean," Cas groaned the second he saw Dean. Of course, he didn't notice the flaccid cock or petrified look on Dean's face due to the fact that Dean was facing away from the door and the low lighting shadowing Dean's limp dick hanging between his thighs. "Oh, God, I've wanted you all day. Look so good for me, Dean." Cas practically was growling rather than speaking to Dean.

And with that, Dean heard Cas unzipping his fly and pulling his belt off. Dean was doing all that he could do to not cry, and he stayed silent, assuming Cas would punish him if he spoke. And if Dean was punished, he would safeword, he knew it. And Cas would be so mad, he'd be furious. Cas had never been angry that Dean had safeworded in the past; in fact, he'd praised him for knowing his limits and being able to communicate with Dean. That being said, Cas was sure to assure him that he loved him back then. Dean hadn't heard those three words in a few weeks. Now, he was a hole to fuck and nothing more to Cas, and holes to fuck didn't safeword, did they? Dean stayed silent.

Soon, Cas was pulling Dean up by his armpits and pulling him over to the bed, bending him over so that there was space between Dean's cock and the mattress' edge. Dean bit the sheets as not to whimper from emotional instability as Cas pulled the plug out gently. Cas guided his cock into Dean's hole and Dean felt only nausea as Cas began roughly pounding into him. At this angle, he hit Dean's prostate on every thrust, and Dean should have been struggling not to moan and writhe under Cas. As it was, however, Dean felt nothing. He derived no pleasure from the situation, and his penis remained flaccid and limp. Dean was so ashamed, silent tears slipping down his cheeks.

Eventually, Cas stopped moaning and started talking. "S-so close, Dean, you feel so good, so perfect for me. Ah, you like that, don't you? D'you wanna come, baby? Hm?" And with that, Dean realized in a horrifying moment that Cas was reaching around to stroke him to orgasm, a split second before Cas' hand found his soft dick. Dean let out a wail that sounded like an animal being tortured, the silent tears becoming very loud as he cried harder.

In less than a moment, Cas pulled out of Dean and flipped him around, terror in the dom's own eyes. 

"Dean?! Oh, God, Dean, shit, shit! Are you hurt?!" Dean let out another pained sob, realizing that Cas' erection was flagging, that his pathetic inability to harden was turning Cas off. And if Cas didn't want him, Dean was as good as on the streets. "Dean, Dean, hey, I need you to breathe. Please, fuck, please breathe, baby, for me? Come on, breath in," Cas guided him, refraining from touching Dean. Which only made things worse, as Dean let himself think that Cas didn't want him anymore, that Cas was disgusted with him. Dean ignored the help Cas was trying to give him.

Instead, Dean slid off the bed, sunk down to his knees, and started for Cas' cock, attempting to bring it back to hardness by shoving it down his throat. Cas, who had fallen silent at Dean sliding off the bed, now let out a yelp and quickly dropped to his knees, now eye to eye with Dean who had cried even harder at Cas pulling away again, at him quickly tucking himself back into his pants and zipping the fly.

"Dean?" Cas' own voice broke at the sight of Dean's tears. Cas cupped Dean's face with gentle hands slowly, making sure Dean wouldn't react badly to the notion of touch before wiping his tears away with his thumbs, brushing over Dean's cheekbones. "Dean, baby, I need for you to tell me what's wrong, okay? Please? Can you tell me why you weren't hard, baby? For me?" Cas kept his voice gentle. Well, if everything was fucked already, Dean might as well explain his errors. He shuddered before whispering his response.

"Didn't feel good." Cas' eyes grew even wider and even more heartbroken at Dean's hoarse words. "I'm s-sor-ry, Cas I-I'm so s-orry," Dean cried out through fat tears and sobs racking his body.

"No, no, Dean, don't be sorry, it's okay. You did nothing wrong, except I wish you had safeworded the moment it started to hurt. Fuck, I shoulda made sure you were okay before. Dean, why did it hurt, baby, can you tell me why it hurt? Did I go too fast?" Cas' voice had gone very high, stress and worry highly evident as he pushed Dean for a response. Dean had gained control of his breathing for the most part, but fat tears still spilled down his cheeks as he responded.

"I, um. I dunno, Ca- Master, prepping didn't feel good at all, I tried everything, couldn't get hard, I tried everything. I'm sorry. I didn't want it. I didn't want to scene. I didn't, I-I didn-t" Dean started breathing funny all over again at Cas' white face. He'd frowned at Dean calling him master, though it was probably more at Dean almost calling him Cas twice, like they were still in a love-oriented relationship, and his face had been drained of all blood the second Dean told him he didn't want to scene.

"Dean, fuck, I'm so sorry. I, um, I'm not c-comfortable touching you knowing that I... I... did that to you. Fuck, I can't believe... Shit, no, no, don't cry, please, Dean, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, don't cry." Cas had pulled his hands away from Dean, making more tears flow from those bright green eyes, Dean absolutely sure he repulsed Cas and that this was his fault. By now, Cas' own eyes were glassy. Dean pulled his knees to his chest.

"Dean, God, why didn't you want to scene, honey? Can you tell me why you didn't safeword? Please? It's okay, you can tell me, sweetheart, I'm not gonna be mad, I swear. Please?" Cas seemed to regain control of himself.

"I- I dunno. I, um, this morning I got up, but then I just kept remembering you... Um, c-calling me names and stuff and I felt really tired and a little sick and I swear I didn't mean to ruin it, I promise, I just didn't wanna have sex, I just let it get to me. I didn't use the s-safeword because I didn't wanna make you mad." Now, at this, Cas let out a long sigh and slumped his shoulders tiredly. Dean was afraid of the disappointment that was sure to come. " I'm sorry," He whispered, one last time.

"You dropped," Cas stated simply, meeting Dean's eyes.

"No," Dean stated simply. No, because he'd thought that might be the case earlier, but then he'd reviewed the logical evidence that pointed to the very realistic idea that Cas had fallen out of love with Dean and he was worth nothing more than some whore working a street corner. "I didn't drop. I thought maybe so, but then I remembered all the things you keep saying and you- y-you haven't..." Dean trailed off.

"Dean," Cas started, "Dean, please, what have I been saying that made you think like this? What have I done, love?" Dean snapped his eyes up to meet Cas'.

"T-that. That. You haven't told me you loved me in the past month, at least, and you keep scening and you're always calling me a slut, whore, plaything, fucktoy, cock-lover, so much more, so much more. Cas, it's clear I'm just sex for you now. I'm sorry I couldn't even fulfill that role." Cas just stared, dumbstruck, for a very long moment. Then, much like the one Dean had let out earlier, Cas wailed. 

Suddenly, Dean found himself wrapped in strong arms, Cas pulling him into a bone-crushing hug. God, it felt so safe. Dean let himself have it, even if in reality it meant nothing. But why was Cas hugging him, then, if it held no emotional value?

"Fuck, Dean," Cas' voice was barely a whisper. "I swear to God I've never loved anyone as much or a strongly as I love you. Because I do, sweetheart, I love you. I never stopped and I never will. I feel awful for making you ever doubt that. I hate myself for letting you drop like that and I don't deserve to even be touching you after raping you, after doing such an awful awful thing. I don't deserve you, Dean, but if you're willing to have me then I love you with all of my heart. You are my world, my everything, my only love. I'm so sorry, Dean. You did nothing wrong, I just need for you to tell me whenever you feel like that, okay, baby? I swear I will never be mad. I'm really fucking sorry." Cas clung tightly to Dean.

By the end of Cas' speech whispered tentatively into Dean's ear, the younger had reciprocated the hug and realized that he had, in fact, experienced a subdrop and that he was so very wrong about everything. And, fuck, why did he think it was a good idea to do this? To do this to Cas as well as himself? Fuck, he was stupid.

"Babe, I'm gonna clean you up, okay? Then I'm gonna get you some clothes and we're gonna talk very thoroughly about what happened, about everything, and we're going to find a way to make sure that this never happens again. Okay, love?" Dean nodded into Cas' neck, feeling a loss as Cas pulled away. He felt so loved, so safe, exactly how he should feel.

Cas offered a hand out to Dean, a warm smile on his face. Dean took it, letting himself be pulled up. Cas sat him down again on the bed, promising to be back momentarily with a wet cloth for the lube now dripping down Dean's thighs messily, as well as a protein bar.

Soon enough, he returned, insisting that Dean finish the protein bar before he did anything. Dean did, feeling a whole lot better after eating something. Cas gently wiped around Dean's pucker and thighs, cleaning away the lube, wincing as he noticed Dean tensing wherever Cas touched him. It hurt Cas to see such an unwillingness to be touched in Dean more than it probably did Dean. Nevertheless, he cleaned quickly and soon had Dean in his most comfortable pajamas, sitting criss-cross and ready to talk about everything.

Sure enough, they discussed every last detail that had caused this mishap, from each and every time Cas had degraded Dean in the past month, to how Dean hadn't eaten anything that day, to the exact thoughts Dean had that past hour and why he thought them. By two in the morning, everything had been settled and Dean was ready to sleep. Cas made sure that Dean's breath had evened out long before he slept, making a vow to never, ever do that to his Dean again.

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this instead of studying for exams on Wattpad, before I had an AO3 account, and it's been sitting, unpublished, on my laptop for quite some time. I did well on my exams despite the distraction if you were wondering. Furthermore, if you find that I've missed any tags feel free to comment and let me know! Also, if you have any prompt ideas I'd be happy to write about them. I hope you liked it!


End file.
